What the hell just Happened?

I looked across the field at my child, who I expected to be playing at a place that has been calm and peaceful for him.  And to my bewilderment and utter surprise, he was totally and completely WILD. He was darting at warp speed, jumping, crashing and crazily frantic.  I stood in fascinated confusion for a few moments and then attempted to grab him.  I missed the first time he passed me so I stepped up my game and leaped at him.  I got him and managed to thwack him accidentally in the head causing him to scream as if I were killing him.  He was oddly maniacal.  His heart was pounding, his eyes bulging and darting about, his body grossly out of control; he was searching for a calm place and it was no where.  Sadly, he did not get that I was the safety ground and was doing my best to get him to a calm place.  

It took all of my strength today to haul him to the car.  He was screaming and thrashing.  It was not pretty.  We caused a small scene.  Once there, sobbing he told me he was really thirsty and hot.  I cooled him and gave him a drink and started to drive.  To which he started screaming at me to stop because he wanted to stay ~ that he loved it there.  We left.  I was confused.  This is not the behavior or the look of someone in a good place.  

The farm is generally such a calm and happy place.  I have not had to worry about where he is or what he is doing in the past.  Today he lost himself.  I lost him.  In a text message to my husband I said our son is possessed by wild animals on the run from hunters in a raging fire.  He could not see me nor hear me.  It was upsetting.  And utterly frightening.  

The worst part was he was not able to tell me what was it that bothered him or set him in the wrong way.  He could only tell me he was hot and thirsty and wanted to stay. 

There is no text book answer for the way our life goes.  It just happens and I roll it up and deal with it ~ whatever it is.  

So we drove.  We calmed down.  We talked about new things.  We held hands quietly.  We stopped at an acre he is attached to and he played in the quiet sunset in the trees and tall grass.  He was found again.  

I may never know and it is ok.  I just go on loving on him.  

There is nothing that prepares for days like this.