No electronics

We took tv away from our child last week ~ for the whole week.  Not just tv; we took all electronics.  He could not play video games, ipad, read electronic book ~ NOTHING.  It was HARD.  Horrible if you ask him.  Challenging.

He does not do well with sudden changes.  It was sudden that we took it away but we needed a serious consequence because of an incident at school.  So sudden change resulted in some anxiety and weirdness.

TV has been his "calmer"... he can zone totally into it.  And for some fraction of his day, we have recently recognized it is not a bad thing for him to just zone out and allow his body to be still.  He has used it to tell me things, relate to things and generally script things when he is struggling.  We took it totally away.  No tv.  He had no way to zone out completely and re-focus himself.

There was not a moment of my time when he could be left alone.  Alone allows him time to wander.  So ever afternoon last week I spent every moment doing something with him.  (OH yea play therapy really works)!  We did the same things we normally do (including a ton of play) but it seemed amplified.  Because he never once stopped.  

this is by far our favorite family game

Our evening hour that generally we let him have something on we spent playing games and building lincoln logs and tic tac toe.  We laughed and giggled.  It was generally fantastic but slightly different because it was not the time when we do those things.  So many of our games are gross motor because that is what he is good at.  Many of them are not calming but stimulating in some fashion or another.  So that time when we usually sit quietly together and watch some cartoon or program, we were actively doing something.  While it was nice and quality family time it was perhaps not right.  There was literally no down time for our child for the whole week.

Being overly tired, he did not sleep well.  He was in bed with us several times.  Or up early for food or snuggles.  He was off.  He could not find a way to quiet himself down and allow his body time to rest.  He is not a child who has figured that out, nor one that likes to be still.

Not once was he quietly still.  Not one time was he just zoned out relaxing peacefully.  Not once was he thoughtlessly mindless about things and calm.  So while taking away tv was a consequence that made the impression we were going for, it had its own repercussion.  So today when he woke up at 6am and I cooked pancakes with him we decided it was time... We sat together and with no prompting he was able to tell us why he had such a serious consequence.  Then he got it back and he binged... he was quietly laying curled on the bed under the covers watching some cute show.  And he needed that down time.

When I find that "thing" that quiets his little body I will certainly use it.  This child is NON STOP GO from moment he is up to moment he is down.  There is NO stopping.  No resting.  No stillness.  He never stops moving and doing.  Not when he is tired or sick or hurt... he just keeps on going.  TV right now, gives him some moments of peace.

Back to the balance this week.  Hopefully!  (At least we have tv time!)....