Sensational Summer Fun

We wait and wait for summer in our house!  Summer means we can be outside for longer periods of time not only because the day is longer but because it is finally warm (or hot).  Summer means we don't have to put on layers of uncomfortable clothing; we can go outside with barely anything and leave the shoes behind!  Ahhh we wait for these short few months! 

For my sensory little boy, summer is the most magical time.  Clothing tends to annoy him so he lives for the moments when he can just live in his swim shorts all day.  Shirt & shoes are totally not necessary.  Unless we are going shopping.  Stop by our house at any moment and you will find him in just shorts!! 

We are outside much of the day even when temperatures reach high into the 100's and the humidity spikes.  We find shade and drink water or koolaid and eat frozen treats.  We make mud messes, finger paint our bodies and the house, chalk up everything we can.  We squirt the dogs with water guns and throw water balloons.  We turn on the water slide in our back yard and the "fire hose" and we use our imagination to put out dangerous situations.  We go to the pool nearly every day and swim in the deepest area, dive for random toys, talk to strangers, jump off the dive board and soak up the warm rays of summer!  We take trips to the zoo and search out interesting animals.  We go to the park and play tag, swing off the monkey bars and climb up the slide (yes that's right UP it because it is fun!).  We put a small pool on the trampoline and jump in and out of it.  We call it splash zone!  We ride our bikes, skateboards, ATV and scooter.  We take a break and go ice skating.  We go on nature hikes and bring home groovy rocks or pinecones.  He plants his own garden and waters it and eats it (this year it is strawberries and mint).  We find bugs and worms and put them in the bug box or dig a hole for them.  We play in the sandbox and hide treasure or his little body!  We make volcanos and mountains explode! 

And when it is time for a rest we lay on the couch eating snacks and watch movies.  Our favorites right now are WRECK IT RALPH, RISE OF THE GUARDIANS, PARANORMAN & HOTEL TRANSALVANIA.  In fact, if you have missed any of those, you should watch them.  They are great!  Can't go wrong with a summer of odd movies!  We play with the wooden train set or the million matchbox cars.  We crash things.  We smash things.  He helps me make no-bake cookies and frozen treats.  We rarely use our oven in the summer so we have to be creative.  Stirring and mixing and cooking are good inside activities. 

Summer fun...  can't happen all year because we live where the sun sets early and the cold sets in for long months.  Months when we are afraid to know the temperature and more afraid not to know.  Months when we have to shovel a path to get out before we can think about fun.  Months when we have to take long minutes putting on all the gear just to stay warm.  Summer is a time to enjoy every moment.  Car trips and travel.  Beaches and ranches and mountains.  Summer is for fun!

We enjoy our summer to the fullest... what are you doing!?

Sensational Time in Florida

We recently returned from Florida!  It was an awesome family vacation!  For our sensory kid it is heaven!  The sand & surf are calming.  Imagine the quiet stretches of sand and the sound of the waves.  The weight of the water and the sand.  Allowing your small body to be crashed and smashed to the ground over & over by the waves.  Being buried under mounds of warm wet sand.  Digging and searching for treasure!  The smell of salt and fish.  The warmth of the sun and the mist in the wind.  Tasting the fish that is freshly cooked.  He was sensory happy for 7 days.  The beach is a beautiful place that clears the head and heals the soul!  For our son, the beach is the most relaxing place.  He was able to sleep soundly and play for long stretches of time.  He was comfortable in his skin.  There was no crashing and smashing into people.  He had the beach to do that to him! 

And we can feel like we can make it another few months in Nebraska because we have the beach calling us back.... Soon soon... for it is a healing place for a sensory kid like Espen!

Enjoy a glimpse of our fun time!! 

Click here to view these pictures larger

Sensational Birthday

My son turned 4!  It is with both happiness and sadness that I celebrated.  For my only child I have only this one chance to make every moment count!  He had a party a few days before hand and he had a great time!  The park is a fantastic place to spend a couple hours.  Keep it simple... we had cupcakes and gifts and he PLAYED.. as long as he wanted.  When he tired we left!  Perfect! 

Our child is mildly obsessive about random things.  One of which is that IF he knows a celebration or holiday is coming up, he will virtually ruin it by his constant questions, unwrapping of gifts and needless stress.  So after 4 years we just don't tell him WHEN things are!  For example, we put up tree at Christmas and we look festive!  He has an advent calendar and we can count days.  But we never tell him when.  Christmas eve we put out every single gift and make the place a wonderland of magic.  And BAM he starts his celebrations!  Otherwise each time I put a gift out it would be a battle to keep it unopened... and the stress would drive him (and me) nuts! 

So his birthday... he wakes quietly!  He had no notion of the day it was!  Found some nail polish I left out and took it to living room!  Painted his nails on my carpet (did make some drops) and saw as he was sitting there the gifts!  OH MAN .. he was so excited to wake us at 6:30am!!   And not only did he have a gift to open as he jumped into the bed, but he had the pretty red toes!!  So as soon as his 2 little gifts were unopened and parts everywhere they had to be put together and tried out!!  OF COURSE!  His mind would be completely out sorts if we didn't do it this way.  And by 7:30am we were trying to clean the carpet and getting outside to test these things!  He was happy and at peace with his world. 

So we had a grand day of fun and celebrating... the spots of nail polish are still on my carpet.  The fireman's water hose is drained and in the garage and the sand scoop has been used to dig a giant hole!  We lost $20 at the pizza place playing video games and riding the rides but we collected enough tickets to bring home yet another gun to shoot balls at mommy with!  And as he went to sleep he said THANK YOU FOR THE BIRTHDAY MOMMY... IT WAS AWESOME.  And so it was all worth it. 

As you think to yourself that I should try to say NO more and make him wait or go back to bed ... my child is told no plenty.  I am not soft or weak.  Life becomes a different pace and way when you live with a tiny boy with some quirky behaviors.  We all adjust.  Be thankful for your children who can wait and keep calm in the face of new things.  Our little boy has terrible time with new situations (even small ones like gifts under a tree) and transitions between things.  We adjust.  It is what life with a sensory kid!  Life is an adventure of sorts and we do the best we can.... to find the happy moments and hold onto them as long as we can!

Merry Go Round mishap

It was a glorious sunny day!  Espen did NOT want to go to school (does any child?).  There are 4 days of school left so I think we can manage to go!  When I picked him up of course I got the litany of what he did bad.  Today was a noisy loud day (end of year stuff) and he was troubled by noise.  He punched 3 kids when they got to loud & to close.  Hitting is bad yet for Espen the perceived fear of the noise is enough to set off his FIGHT response.  Yes he should be re-directed, "punished" and apologize.  So today (the ONLY in the whole year) the preschool got to go outside.  Because Espen punched he had to stay inside for the 30 minutes and sit in a chair.  WHAT THE WHAT.  I understand we can not hit our friends.  I understand it is not acceptable.  I understand it all.  Yet the gross motor play that will calm my child down was taken away instead of an alternative corrective measure.  And big surprise.... he acted out again when the kids came back inside.  So I hear all this and thank the teacher and take my child by the hand.  We talk for a few minutes as I'm buckeling him in his seat about school.  And he says to me "mom I hit them.  I apologized.  I know I should have said something or moved but I couldn't find a quiet spot and I was only one who didn't get to play.  I hate school".  I nearly cried because his vocabulary is amazing.  And if he is heard, he can vocalize what is happening.  So I explained in my mom way that we can't hit the children.  There are no reasons ever to hit anyone. 

It was sunny today and I had a plan!  We were going to Mahoney State Park.  I needed a park pass and there is a great park out there!  An adventure!  We stopped at the gas station before the park to get cash.  I had the transaction half complete and Espen wanders off and opens a door to a restroom and goes inside.  I could not leave the ATM and he was on a mission.  For the FIRST TIME, he went without being asked into the restroom and used the toilet!  He locked his stall, took care of his business and washed his hands.  I was waiting inside the restroom!  He was SO proud of himself and I was just as proud!  Although a bit nervous about this sense of independence he has.  So many things to talk to him about when he goes pee alone but for today, I am simply happy he did not pee his pants!!  It was a great thing! 

We had an awesome time.  Unfortunately there were some children his age he tried to play with who were mean spirited and kept calling him names.  After seeing his hurt look about why they ran FROM him I played with him and redirected his attention.  Then he decided to ride the merry go round with a group of older children.  He refused to sit in the middle but I knew was ready to go as fast as they were and he was holding on.  Just as I was thinking to take a picture, he slipped and his feet went flying.  They guy spinning them didn't notice right away that Espen was FLYING and holding on by shear strength.  The other 4 kids on the merry go round noticed and were yelling for him to HOLD ON!!  I acted fast so there were no pictures and I caught him just as he let go.  He was totally fine.  Unhurt.  Shocked.  Embarrassed that he flew off.  But to my surprise, the kids cheered for him and told him how brave and strong he was.  And he wanted to ride again, and ride it they all did!  I was afraid and shocked and amazed at my little boy.  And for 2 hours he played with these kids.  The boys were 6 & 7 and they played so nicely with him.  Included him, encouraged and taught.  It was a great time for Espen and for me.  They were just as fast and enjoyed climbing as he so I didn't have to worry that one of them would be hurt. 

Then he followed them UP the giant slide and tried to swing his legs over the slide to grab the pole leg and slide down.  He was not quite big enough and I managed to get him back inside the walls of the slide.  The older boys stopped doing that because Espen was not able to do it.  Impressive!  My heart was about to stop.  Two seriously freaky near accidents very close to each other.  It really is the story of my life.  I try not to over react or panic.  He manages.  With his lack of regard or feeling for pain it is always interesting what he finds to do and how he does it.   I thought today that there will be a day when I witness my child be injured seriously.  Thankfully it was not today. 

When it was time to go, he hugged all the kids in the family and looked the mom in the eye and THANKED her for letting the kids play with him.  He is really a gift.  She hugged him to.  It was amazing!

Oddly, I got to witness my child react to loud noises.  A large group came over from a field for a picture on the slides and the noise level was LOUD and the teacher was blowing a whistle and yelling.  I have never seen Espen in the situation and I was sad to see him jump down and HIDE under a slide in a very tight little spot.  I had to coax him out and promise him we would move away from the group.  He was shaking with fear.  I believe had a small child been near him, he would have punched them. 

So it turned into a great day for us.  Especially for Espen.  We ended with an ice cream cone adventure.  The punching is past.  We move on quickly.  Unfortunately, the ones who were punched won't and we will have issues.  But I proud of my little boy.  He is amazingly strong, charming and kind. 

Don't worry mommy ...

The three most dreaded words a child can utter.  "Don't worry mommy....".  For Espen those words can only mean I better watch out!  "I didn't eat it", "I didn't poop on the floor," "I won't fall to far from the deck".  He is a clever and creative little boy.  But also mindless of the danger he may be facing by doing the stunts he imagines are going to be tons of fun! 

Most lately, he has been saying "Don't worry mommy, I have SPD".  And if you ask him what that means he can tell you Sensory Processing Disorder.  We have all the children's books about it and he loves to read about kids like him.  Kids who like to crash into things or fear loud sounds or are bothered by clothing.  He can tell you that SPD makes him feel normally crazy!

My son knows he is gifted in many ways.  Yet he can't comfortably look me in the eye.  That is sensory overload for him.  He can't use a fork for dinner.  It is just hard and his frustration goes through the roof so we make adjustments.  He can't stop screaming at the grocery store or in the car about the sounds and the lights.  He can't write his name or draw me a picture.  Holding the crayon is a frustrating challenge.  He can't wear pants with buttons or zippers.  He lacks the dexterity to fasten them back up and independence is a huge issue in our house.  He doesn't get the opportunity to play much with other children because parents are concerned with his strength and crashing into them. 


All of these things the occupational therapists help with.  And it gets better some days and worse some.  We just keep going.  And we are thankful for his giant vocabulary!  So that he can learn to tell us the SPD things! 

Normal things in our house are not normal in yours!  It is normal for us to be outside no matter the weather.  It is normal to have few distractions or noises in our house.  It is normal to wear 4 or 5 or 6 changes of clothes every day!  It is normal to make giant messes with flour, water, paint, goop, chalk.  It is normal to have a sensory swing in the dining room and a scooter board in the hallway and a mini trampoline in the living room.  It is normal to hang from the pull-up bar and eat while standing.  It is normal to take baths 2 or 3 times a day and to still use a binky.  It is normal to have no shirt or socks on even on the coldest days.  And fast... we are sorry if you can't keep up with us.... we move very quickly and that is normal. Don't worry, Espen has SPD and it is normal and fantastic and aggravating and confusing all at the same time.  Even for him!  But he knows it is how he is.  It is his normal. 


Sometimes people don't understand or they get scared or concerned.  That is ok.  Sometimes kids won't play because he is to rough.  And that is ok.  "Don't worry mommy, I have SPD, but I gotta try, gotta try."  My child is amazing.  Just get to know him! 

This is our normal...  nothing we do is weird or remarkable.  But consider if your words or remarks are hurtful to one small little boy who wants to try.... Consider if your children call him weird or stupid how that feels....

Don't worry Espen.... mommy believes your normal and just as you are meant to be....

Summer Activities

The summer, although the weather is not demonstrating it, is nearly here!  End of school is clearly in sight.  In Nebraska parents are already planning the summer activities for their children.  So I jumped on that band wagon and started to think about what we would do for the summer.  We are on a tight budget and can't afford to go to every activity but the importance of participation in summer fun does not go un noticed! 

I can't speak of every community but if you are looking for great things to do with your child or children this summer here are some places to start...

• The library ~ reading groups and programs, check out books on themes or topics for home activities.  Most typically these are free! 
• Whole Foods ~ cooking classes for all ages, but especially great ones for half pints!  Great way to get your child to eat different foods or try new stuff!  In our area it is $8 per child per class. 
• Forest preserve ~ outdoor day camps, explore and see different natural habitats
• Sport camps ~ I found a gymnastics studio, the ymca, a dance studio, a martial arts studio and athletic centers all have sport/athletic things for children
• swimming pool ~ swim lessons are so important for kids!  Last year I paid so much for pool visits and for the pool in our back yard that this year I joined a country club social membership for the summer.  It is CLOSE and we can use the pool anytime! 
• ice skating ~ ESPECIALLY when it is really hot!  It makes for a great place to COOL off!
• roller skating~ our local rink has classes & programs all summer long
• zoo & museums ~ both near us have summer programs.  We tried the zoo camps last year and did not like them.  Ask some questions before paying for it!  Memberships help off set multiple trips to these locations! 
• art centers ~ look for community art facilities.  There is typically someone teaching a mixed media type class!
• splash pads or your garden hose!  Great way to cool off for free! 
• garden centers ~ a clever and fun way to be around plants.  Frequently they have some basic classes or demonstrations and children are super interested in what grows.
• project swap ~ trade afternoons with a mom friend and entertain all the children for a couple hours in some project or activity.  Maybe a giant finger paint party, pedicure party, bake up something fun, take a nature walk and find things

Hopefully our summer is equal parts sitting by the pool and swimming in the pool but we may need some other activities so we will see where our desires lie!!  I'd love to hear your ideas for summer fun!! 

Obsessive Compulsive

My son will be 4 soon (hard to imagine).  We have had some very rough days where I was just WORN down.  Our issues lately are getting better to understand.  My patience is on extended service.  Except the obsessive compulsive behaviors. 

Obsessive-compulsive disorder is an anxiety disorder in which people have unwanted and repeated thoughts, feelings, ideas, sensations (obsessions), or behaviors that make them feel driven to do something (compulsions).A.D.A.M.

Often the person carries out the behaviors to get rid of the obsessive thoughts, but this only provides temporary relief. Not performing the obsessive rituals can cause great anxiety.

We are no where near an OCD diagnosis but he has tendencies that mock the erratic behaviors. The repeated thoughts and ideas that drive him to action and fits of uncontrolled worry!  It is hard to reason with him, persuading him to something else is nearly impossible and forget about changing his mind!  The last 3 days he has been OBSESSED with his whistle.  He is driving me insane! 

He asks, searches, talks about, begs me to find, helps me search and strongly demands the whistle.  It is nothing more than an inexpensive whistle Hannah got him on one of their excursions to Target.  But the last few days he has worried, cried, cajoled and harassed me about the whistle. I can not find it.  No where.  On and off now for 3 days I have had to calm him about a whistle and I am 100% certain that until we find the whistle, he will question me and we will look for this whistle. 

He remembers and recalls things and he worries, stresses and has anxiety when we can't find it or satisfy his obsession.  Thankfully it is most always only one issue at a time.  I have been dealing with this quirky behavior since he was able to talk!  Unfortunately, it seems to get weirder as he gets older.  I find the best way to manage him when he is obsessed and compulsively doing something is to be calm.  I always assist in the search if there is one.  I try to keep his anxiety at a minimum and focused on just the one thing so that he doesn't stress and worry about unnecessary things.  I try to get us to a safe and quiet place.  We keep things in a fairly organized manner so that things don't get lost.  Because he is not just obsessed with things but activities and people we have a schedule so there is little surprise in his routine.  If I tell him we will do something in a particular order, we do it.  We don't give him much "warning" about holidays or birthdays because he will worry, stress and have fits about what will happen.  The word SURPRISE is not a good word at our house. 

My son... almost 4.... and the fun never stops!! Now excuse me... I have to go look for a whistle!!